11 Luke 11

Today is Luke's 11th birthday.

Whenever I encounter one of my children having a birthday, one of my first things I do after thinking "Can another year have possibly gone by?" is I will reminisce about the day they were born and the years I have had with them. Luke's birth was especially trying for me....I would even have to say his birth was my most difficult.

I was induced with all my kids. So for me
Pitocin = Hard, fast, painful contractions = Epidural.
My mom had our children for the weekend while I was having Luke, she brought them up to visit right before lunch time. She didn't stay long, and Jonathan walked her out to her car. He took his time coming back stopping at the gift shop and cafeteria...not realizing while he was gone, that my labor had kicked in. I called out for an epidural, but apparently they had a couple of deliveries going on at the time. So, there I sat all alone in my room breathing through hard contractions. Jonathan returned to the room about 45 minutes later, by then I was losing "it". The anesthesiologist hadn't come in yet, nor had my nurse. My frustration level exponentially increased after an hour went by without a word from anyone. I called out again and was told everyone was busy. The defiant creature that I am...I looked at Jonathan and said "I know how to get them in my room"...and proceeded to tear off all my belts and monitors. (*Note* I was not a nurse at this point) and was having great difficulty finding a comfortable position while being "tied down".

Within ten minutes...both my nurse and the anesthesiologist were in my room sitting me up for an epidural. I will admit, I did have some guilt when my poor nurse had to hunch underneath the bedside table and put my belts and monitors back on while the anesthesiologist prepped me for the epidural, but that didn't replace the abandonment I was feeling when they wouldn't come "help" me. It seemed like the epidural took an eternity to get in, but eventually they were laying me down again...I couldn't wait for the numbness to wash over me. I waited... and waited, but the numbness only went over the left half of my body. Could this really be happening? They flipped me back and forth a few times...nothing. The anesthesiologist tried to re-adjust the epidural catheter...still nothing. I was becoming more and more frustrated with every moment, because the pain seemed intensified on the right side of my body. In fact, I would get Charlie Horse's in my right thigh with every contraction. The anesthesiologist was horrified and never left my bedside until after I delivered.

Fortunately, I usually progress from 4 cm to 10 cm dilated within 45 minutes. I made it to complete and was told I could push...but pushing wasn't doing any good (This was my third baby...I knew how to get those li'l whipper snappers out by now). When Dr. Kirkhope came in (Dr. Briel wasn't answering his page) and checked the position of the baby, he discovered that Luke was facing up, instead of down. That's a problem! I was beside myself at this point I was in the worse pain of my life, my own doctor wasn't even there, and I couldn't seem to get this baby out....and now they are telling me it is because of the way he was laying. I started to become irrational and started begging them to do anything "cut my head off, give me a c-section...JUST GET THIS BABY OUT!" When suddenly the thought came to me, "Get the Kirby!" Dr. Kirkhope perplexed asked "What?" I informed him, "Dr. Briel helped me deliver my first baby with that vacuum thingie. Get the Kirby!". Dr. Kirkhope (amused) said, "Tell you what. I'll use the vacuum if you'll let me flip this baby over? I don't foresee you delivering him on your own otherwise." I readily agreed, desperately wanting things to be over with.

After the next contraction finished, Dr. Kirkhope promptly flipped Luke over in one try...causing me more pain in a single moment than I had ever known. Luke was now in the correct position. A couple more pushes and Luke was born. Even though, he was only 8 lbs, he had a larger than usual head. Big surprise :D Not a very fun experience at all :(

The first moment, I laid eyes on Luke...all was forgiven. It was absolutely love at first sight. He was so beautiful, and such an incredibly good baby. I was so nervous about having another baby after all of the struggles I had with Kyle. But it was as if Luke was my reward for all of my diligent efforts. He was so easy to take care of. He was sleeping through the night from the very start. He was so content...all he cared about was being held. As long as Jonathan or I were near, he was completely fine. We called him the "Great Observer" because he was so happy just to watch all the commotion in our home...he never felt the need to be a part of that commotion. I would have to mentally remind myself to remember Luke and his needs, because it was so easy to forget he was even there when he had two older brothers and even a younger brother who demanded so much of our attention.

In the back of my mind, I wondered if his passiveness might be indicating some underlying condition...but I simply enjoyed it while it lasted and for the blessing it was to our family. Having two other children with special needs...it didn't take long to recognize the delays in Luke. He has had his share of testing, therapy, and special interventions. I don't really feel like he has actually been accurately diagnosed yet, although I have felt for many years that he fits the criteria for Asbergers Autism. Even so, Luke is a delight to most people who come in contact with him. If you get the opportunity to work one on one with him...he will warm your heart with his sweet spirit and giving heart. The moment he gives you his smile...he has most people wrapped around his finger. I am told again and again what a delight he is.

As much as I enjoy who Luke is now, and love witnessing his growth each and every day...I miss that baby of mine. I miss holding him close and never wanting to let him go. I miss feeling his warmth and absolute need for me. It has been such a blessing to have Luke in our lives.
Happy Birthday Luke!
I am so grateful you are a part of my heart :D