Sunday, March 20, 2011

Be nice

Recently, I received my job evaluation which was exceptional except for one area. Our floor has incorporated a Peer Evaluation component into our job eval format. One of the comments made in one of my peer evaluations referred to the fact that I don't always communicate kindly with my fellow co-workers. I was greatly disturbed by this, not because I disagree that I can tend to be harsh at times because I know I can, but moreso because we have been counselled in our Unit Practice Council to hold our peers accountable and be willing to say the "hard" things to them to ensure quality patient and nursing care. This seemed to me to be a contradiction, one moment I am being asked to hold my co-workers accountable, and in the next moment I am being marked off on my job evaluation as a result. Because I have a difficult time not internalizing things, I have really been struggling with this.

Today, I was really touched when I came across this quote by Gordon B. Hinckley...."I come to you tonight with a plea that we stop seeking out the storms and enjoy more fully the sunlight. I am suggesting that as we go through life we try to 'accentuate the positive.' I am asking that we look a little deeper for the good, that we still our voices of insult and sarcasm, that we more generously compliment virtue and effort. Now I am not asking that all criticism be silenced. Growth comes of correction. Strength comes of repentance. Wise is the man or woman who can acknowledge mistakes pointed out by others and change his or her course.

"What I am suggesting is that you turn from the negativism that so permeates our modern society and look for the remarkable good among those with whom you associate, that we speak of one another's virtues more than we speak of one another's faults, that optimism replace pessimism, that our faith exceed our fears. When I was a young man and was prone to speak critically, my wise father would say: 'Cynics do not contribute. Skeptics do not create. Doubters do not achieve.' "

I've decided rather than allowing this experience to make me feel badly about the kind of person I am or to defeat me, that I will grow from this. I have made an index card of this quote that I will carry with me. When I feel the temptation to be unkind, I will read this quote to remind me that we all need a little more kindness in this world.