Mark Schultz - He's My Son

When I was at Time Out For Women last weekend, Dallyn Vail Bayles sang this song (This version is not Dallyn singing, but rather Mark Schultz). When Dallyn sang, the spirit was so strong. It was as if he was bearing his testimony with every song he sang.

I began to sob as I listened to the words of this song...

Our journey raising our children has not been an easy one. With the birth of our first three sons, it was apparent very early on that there were some things that weren't quite "right" with them developmentally. Then with Nicholas we had a seemingly "normal" son who developed appropriately, and then he was stricken with RSV as a newborn and struggled with Reactive Airway Disease the first few years of his life. My first thoughts when facing these challenges were, "life is hard enough...I don't want them to have to struggle even more." You bring these children in to the world and you know that they are going to have tough times, but you just pray that those tough times will be minimal and they'll have all of the resources they need to get them through.

Kyle has been our child who has taken the most patience, perseverance, and love in raising. He is also the child who has taught us the most about who we are and what we are capable of. From the time he was a newborn, I've found myself trying to find a way to help him and make him happy. His heart is good, but he has always struggled. As I began spending years, tirelessly teaching and attempting to guide him, I always looked toward the day when he would grow out of "all of this" and finally know better.

A few years ago, the doctor sat down and had a heart to heart with me regarding the possibility that Kyle may never outgrow "this", but may always need our support, strength, and guidance throughout his life. This was a sobering thought for me...and really began changing my focus and direction with Kyle.

I was grateful for that "heart to heart" when Kyle was diagnosed, shortly thereafter, as being Autistic NOS, on top of his ADHD, Developmental Delays, Dyslexia, and behavior issues. My next thought was "how on earth are we going to get him through the teen years?" I attempted to go online and quickly became intimidated with the possibility of what the teen years might bring.

The journey in to the teen years is becoming more and more arduous. As Kyle goes through his body changing and growth spurts that come with puberty, he is also becoming more and more difficult to manage. He goes from being my sweet, loving boy to a violent, cussing, angry boy within a matter of seconds. We try to use behavior programs and anger management methods, but once he decides to "cross that line" he becomes completely unreasonable and will hit or destroy anything or anyone in his path...he cusses like a "trucker"... and he will say any hurtful thing he can think of. On many occasions, it has taken Jonathan, Dylan and I to take Kyle "down"... restraining him until he will finally settle down. It's exhausting emotionally and physically and once it's all said and done, my heart breaks more for Kyle and what he is going through, than what we have been put through.

I want so much for him not to have to have these struggles. I want for him to feel accepted amongst his peers. Puberty is difficult enough to go through without having all of these struggles combined with them. I want so much for Kyle to know how "normal" feels. As hard as we try to provide "normal everyday" experiences for him, he never quite is able to manage not struggling for every single thing he wants in life. What he wants most of all right now (Feeling like he fits in, having friends, and normality) he is incapable of attaining.

As I listened to this song, I was so deeply touched that our Heavenly Father knows of our struggles. He loves our little ones as much, if not more than we do. I am grateful to have the knowledge that when our "best" stops being good enough, Heavenly Father's "best" steps in.

Luke's Birthday Spirit Rock

Dad painting the Spirit Rock

Luke is very excited about his birthday coming up this weekend.
We wanted to surprise him by painting the spirit rock at his school

Mom did the majority of the painting and even ended up with a blister on her index finger from it.
Luke, you are worth it :D

We thought the black, silver and white would make a nice contrast...but it really didn't turn out as nicely as we had hoped.
Oh well, it's the thought that counts ;)

This is difficult to read, but it says
"You rock Luke"

We left a message for Luke to meet us out by the Spirit Rock when he got out of school.

He was very pleasantly surprised

I cannot believe my boy is turning 12 :s

Snickerdoodle wanted to say "Happy Birthday" too...MEOW!

Time Out For Women 2010

Time Out for Women is an inspirational event featuring presentations by respected authors and artists who address the spiritual challenges and needs of women in the Church. It's a great opportunity for women to gather and get recharged.

So excited! On our way to the David L. Lawrence Conference Center for Time Out For Women

I was such a lucky girl on this trip. Not only did I get to spend the weekend with my mom (which is always a good time), but I was able to also convince my very dear friend, Susan to come along. The trip was so much sweeter because she was there.

Karen with Dallyn

"From Phantom to solo gigs with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir to the role of Joseph Smith, Dallyn’s done it all. And it doesn’t matter if he’s singing your favorite hymn or a well-loved Broadway hit—when Dallyn sings it from his heart, you feel it in yours...it is truly a musical testimony."

Maria and Mom with Dallyn Vail Bayles

Dallyn isn't usually bearded, but he is preparing for an audition for a New Testament Movie and needed to look the part.

Mari and Dallyn

Karen and my mom served in Young Womens when Ardeth Kapp was General Young Womens President.

"Do you feel like you have enough hope, or do you wish you had more? There is a principle of hope that can bless your life in new ways. Drawing on a lifetime of experiences, Ardeth shares steps you can take every day to increase your hope and discover the promises that await you."

Ardeth Kapp with Debbie Jastal

*Sister Kapp said that" one woman is influential, 10 women are helpful, 100 women are powerful but 1000 women are invincible!"
*Prayer is calling home, calling our Father.
*She said let your covenants be paramount and your obedience exact. She assured us that He Knows!
*We need to put Faith in place of Fear, Hope in place of doubts and Charity in place of contention.

John shared with us how often he is mistaken for pro football players like Steve Young :D
This is his football player stance
John shared with us some thoughts regarding "teams"
Often times "even though we are in the last days, and we all know who wins...there are those who still struggle to decide what team's jersey they are going to wear."
He read this poem called "The Weaver"

My Life is but a weaving

between my Lord and me;

I cannot choose the colors
He worketh steadily.

2 Oft times He weaveth sorrow
And I, in foolish pride,
Forget He sees the upper,
And I the under side.

3 Not til the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly,
Shall God unroll the canvas
And explain the reason why.

4 The dark threads are as needful

In the Weaver's skillful hand,

As the threads of gold and silver

In the pattern He has planned.

5 He knows, He loves, He cares,
Nothing this truth can dim.
He gives His very best to those
Who leave the choice with Him.

I grew up listening to John Bytheway talks on Temple Trips to Chicago and Toronto.
He came to a youth conference in our stake the year after I had graduated.
Many in our group still remembered that youth conference with fondness.
It was so fun to finally meet John in person.

"John Bytheway is a prolific writer and an equally prolific thinker. And so when he shares what he’s learned by attending TOFW events in the past, it means something. Sharing his own insights about life and the gospel, John reminds us of the importance of focusing on the basics."

The fountain outside of the Conference Center

The other side of the fountain

Me watching Susan take pictures

The Pittsburgh night line as we left the Conference Center on Friday night

Susan Rapp, Martha Pilbeam, Leslie Lake, Karen Benner, Mari Tribett, Maria Simons, Sarah Reyes-Cairo and Terry Fox

Karen Benner and Hilary Weeks

"Hilary is not just a great songwriter and incredible performer. She is first and foremost a woman—a wife, a mother, a daughter, a sister. Her humor and her testimony make every event perfect."

Susan is converted to being a fan of Hilary Weeks now too

*Hilary spoke to us about gossip...she shared a quote she once saw in a shop outside of a Cracker Barrel which said "I don't repeat gossip...so listen closely."
*She then quoted 1 Peter 3:10 "For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile" (In the footnote this is referring to gossip).
*Her goal is to not gossip and she prays about this each morning.
*She also said the He has the power to multiply and magnify, not just the loaves but our talents.

Maria, DeAnne Flynn, Karen Benner, Mom and Mari Tribett

"Leave your sewing tools at home. This mother of seven is not talking about those kinds of patterns. Are you hoping to raise good kids? While there might be headaches and heartaches along the way, with the Lord’s patterns as our foundation, that hope can turn into reality."

DeAnne talked about patterns "And again, I will give unto you a pattern in all things, that ye may not be deceived; for Satan is abroad in the land, and he goeth forth deceiving the nations" D&C 52:14.

She pointed out that obedience is not transferrable. We need to follow the patterns the Lord has set for us.

Mom, Michael Wilcox, Karen Benner, Maria and Mari Tribett

"Though some may believe hope is a gift we either have or don’t have, Michael believes hope is something we create consciously. And he has the scripture stories to back that up. You’ll discover that hope becomes the natural emotional consequence of living key gospel principles."

Michael told the story of the Israelites spying out the promised land. Joshua and Caleb came back with the fruit and encouraged the people to enter in. But the others that went with them told of the giants and the walls around the land. Then Brother Wilcox asked, "Will we be wall watchers looking at giants or grape gatherers seeing the fruit?" God brought down the walls of Jericho and the Giant Goliath. God will bring down our walls and giants IF we focus on the fruits. David was given bears and lions to fight that prepared him to face Goliath. What lions and bears are we facing that is preparing us for a battle in our future?

Mary Ellen Edmund autographs our tickets for us.

"We know some of you know that song—you know, the one about the ant? MEE has been learning about resilience: how to get it, how to keep it, and what to do with it. And she’s sharing life lessons from her own personal journey."

Maria and Terry Fox

Being diagnosed with cancer and ultimately losing her sight initially left Kris Belcher in a hopeless state. But, she learned that when she walked, facing the light of the sun, the light from THE Son filled her dark world with a light only He could give.

She described LIGHT = L ove, I ntelligence, G race, H ope, T ruth.

My mom was so excited to be "vindicated" by Kris Belcher.
My mom contends with others who claim that Heavenly Father won't give us more trials that we can bear. In fact often times, He does just that to drive us to our knees and teach us that only with Him are we able to bear most of our burdens.
Kris mentioned this very fact in her presentation.

Mari Tribett, Mom, Kris Belcher, Maria, and Karen Benner

How often do you get to see a urinal???
These two together spell T-R-O-U-B-L-E :)
(They converted some of the mens rooms into ladies rooms, since there were ~1000 women there)

Mom trying things out...Crazy girl!

Walking back to the van to head home :D

As we left the Conference Center and headed back to our hotel, we witnessed these signs...
the one says Strip District and the other is for Liberty Ave.
I couldn't resist saying "Give me liberty or give me strip!" (Tee hee hee)

It drizzled as we walked back to our van.

The bridge over the Allegheny River

We were right by the Heinz factory

Susan reminisced about a trip she took with her family last fall, where her sister was panicking about the hills/mountains and curves they had to drive through to get to Connecticut. She referred to them as "vistas of death and valleys of doom."
(I had to get a picture)

This trip was "just what the doctor ordered" for so many of us.
I was so grateful to have been "filled" back up when arriving home to discover really tough trials happening in those I care for...my turn to help others find "hope"

"You Gorgeous Stack of Pancakes"

I've been thinking the last couple of weeks how much it bothers me that "people" in general say such horrible things about others...especially behind their backs. I was becoming even more cognizant of the fact that even I am guilty, at times, of the same atrocity. I may not talk about others regularly, but I am definitely guilty of "back-biting" and "gossiping".

I had to take Dylan to the Pediatrician today to check out what is causing all of this hip pain for him. The receptionist there exuded pure happiness. Her friendliness and exuberance was catchy. She absolutely tickled me when she called a co-worker to ask a question and started the phone conversation with "Well hello, you gorgeous stack of pancakes!" She then looked at Dylan and said "You're a gorgeous stack of pancakes, too!" I loved it! What a great way to greet others.

I began considering the kind of messages I reveal to others through the ways I treat others and decided to make a change. I am going to make a real effort to avoid saying any mean, malicious, or back-biting comments about another. I am constantly telling my children "if they can't think of anything kind/nice to say, then they need to say nothing at all." I need to heed my own advice! I don't need to join in on the "clucking" that occurs around me, but rather I can stand as a "safety" for others where they know there "name is always safe in my mouth".

By small and simple things, great things can come to pass. Little by little I try to become the person, I know I can be. Don't be surprised if you hear me calling you "A Gorgeous Stack of Pancakes." :D

Easter Egg Coloring 2010

We didn't end up dying our Easter Eggs before Easter, so we did it today
Better late, than never!

Daddy helps

Nicholas learning the process

Luke making one of his tye dyed eggs

Here's Dylan's!

Nicholas shows off his masterpiece

Kyle begins to create

First egg

Dylan's masterpiece

Luke's

Kyle shows off his masterpiece

Luke shows off one of his works of art

Their creations

Beautiful!

Call the art museum! We have a masterpiece!